HERO
Or be the superhero in the movie of your life and activate your superpowers.
Being sick of yourself takes its toll. Beating yourself up everyday means you’re living a hard life. It’s exhausting. When you’re sitting in darkness, reminiscing about failures of past times, you are quick to say: Well, that’s me. That’s just who i am. What a loser.
Wrong, my friend. You don’t have to accept your current state of discomfort as your way of life. You carry too much baggage around. Not only the shame of your first drunk black outage. All the bad decisions, you can’t seem to get rid of, like that terrible tingling sensation in your nose, are luggage you have to leave behind.
First of all: When bad memories enter your mind, shake your head like a dog chewing on a toy. Throw them out! Bad thoughts never lead to progress. They make you a victim. Poor me! Yes, you should pity yourself, if all you do is think bad thoughts.
Let’s make it clear: You’re not the person, that will never amount to anything. Not the kind of guy that is, who he is, that will never change. Not the girl that embarrassed herself during a presentation, so she has to keep her controversial opinion to herself. Not the hanger-on who stuttered in a job interview, so a dead end job is all he’ll ever get. Hell, you’re not the person who doesn’t deserve happiness, because his first love cheated on him.
Maybe that is who you were. All the painful mistakes, all the missed opportunities, all the turned down invitations, they’re the past. The past can be forgotten, memories are nothing but hot air. That old version of you dissolved, in this very moment, if you want to. Poof! If you don’t think about past chapters of your life, they don’t exist anymore. It is as simple.
And it gets better as people can change. Especially you, such a bright and wonderful person, that you are!
Your past led you to this very moment, nothing more. You could lie to yourself and say that you made everything right, it wouldn’t change the present, would it? The past led to the present, but it doesn’t define the future. Feeling bad about past blunders is kinda like dressing for yesterdays weather.
I say it is time to stop accusing the past you of having wasted your time. Unless you invent a time machine – who cares? On my clock it is time to move forward. Even jail birds get a second chance, so you certainly deserve one. It is time we change the perspective and challenge you. The first step into making your life easier: Look ahead.
Lights, camera, action!
Be the superhero of your own life.
Fancy life as a movie. Up until now the plot was rather sad. The origin story was pretty depressing, to be completely honest. But who cares, we all know it will get better, right?!?
A new look.
An easy way to start the positive change is to give your main character a new look. By that I mean modern look. No wonder you think your life stands still. Everything you’re wearing is 10 years old! Current fashion brings your life back to the here and now.
Your first action step is to change your appearance.
So change your perspective. Make an out-of-body experience. Your job on set is stylist. Don’t worry, you don’t have to dress up in a costume. But I’m sure there are a few things you want to improve in the looks department, right? Needless to say, you can only tackle things that are in your hands. Nose, voice, size, you have to deal with whatever you got – accept yourself.
Check out that handsome son of a gun in the mirror from top to bottom.
I’m impressed, you don’t need that much work after all. But: Have you ever tried the new hairstyle, you think is so stylish? A new outfit? New pants? A current trend? You’ll be amazed how much of a difference a new style can make.
Let actors inspire you: Who looks cool? Let people of the main street inspire: What does the guy/girl with the kind of girl/guy you’re into wear? What kind of clothing wear people in your dream job? Don’t be a copycat, be you. Give your new outfits a touch of superhero.
What stops most people from changing they’re style is fear. Fear they’ll get judged or even laughed at. Don’t be afraid of other peoples reactions. I can guarantee you, that your colleagues will look twice, when you waltz into the room. People are noticing change. That’s neither positive nor negative. Being scared of other peoples reactions is way worse, than any crap they could talk behind your back, will ever be. In most cases people will applaud you. And besides, don’t you have bigger fish to try, than to impress people with no sense of style whatsoever.
You can get a haircut now, you buy some new clothes now, you can even start a new workout routine right now. When you look like a hero, it is easier to act like a hero.
Finding you.
You’re quite successful. Congratulations, you are now a critic and a screenwriter. What a career!
The next step in becoming your own superhero: Become who you want to be. You have to be proud of the person you are. It is time for some character development. Think about yourself. Are you the kind of person you would root for? Should you stand tall in the end? Would a character like you get killed of? Do you deserve that long kiss in the when the credits roll?
I’m sure there are some things you want to improve, probably even need to. Are you sometimes a bully, mean, ungrateful and overall could be nicer? Let’s work on that. Sure, change is hard. You lived your whole life like that, but don’t you think that one kid that got bit by that one animal in that one flick didn’t have to change his behavior?
What kind of character treats do you enjoy? You enjoy being around pleasant people, right?
To change yourself, you have to think differently. Being polite, smiling and being grateful is necessary to become a hero. When you interact with people, treat them just the way a hero would in a blockbuster.
Life is nothing but decisions. Each and every decision affects the outcome. You can become who you want to be. You are the captain of this ship! If you want to be proud of yourself, you have to change the way you act and interact. Each interaction offers a good decision and a bad one. What stops you from improving yourself? A bad decision. Life gets easier when you’re nice, so greet people or offer and helping hand.
Obviously it is not enough to be a decent person to consider yourself a hero. You have to act the part.
Isn’t what you do and the way you act who you are? So let’s do the stuff a hero does.
You need a plan. Sure, writing stuff down makes you feel like your back at your desk in that lame period in school. But you’re negotiating a contract with the person you want to be. Be brave, grab a pen. Paper doesn’t forget, so use it, when you’re being analytical. Write down what you want to improve. Write down what you have to work on. Write down how you want to be. What is the hero like? Which characteristics do you enjoy? What kind of values would you teach your child? Do you want your superhero to be thoughtful and reserved? Or rather the jolly chatterbox that tells the best joke at the party?
There are only right answers, as you now know your path to victory.
Then comes the hard part. Whatever you want your superpowers to be, you need to hone your skills to become an expert. Now it get’s worst, you have to think about all the little steps, that get you to the goal.
Little by little is the easiest way to achieve something, so make a another list full of small tasks. Each step should be easy to achieve. At least this work brings some positivity in your life: solve a problem and check it off.
Challenge yourself everyday with little tasks. Here are some examples, if you, lets say, want to be more open, become a bestselling author, have lots of friends over, be in decent shape, look better or be funny.
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Today you smile at two strangers, tomorrow you wish three of them a good morning. The day after tomorrow you start a chat about the weather.
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Today you write at least 10 pages of your future novel, tomorrow you work on the plot, on the weekend you read correction.
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Today you clean 10 minutes, tomorrow you vacuum for half an hour, then you throw out three unnecessary dust catchers and buy some drinks for the people you want to invite.
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Today you walk for an hour, tomorrow you will do 50 sit-ups and the day after tomorrow you will be torturing your arms with push-ups.
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Today you go to the hairdresser, and take application photos, tomorrow you look through the job advertisements, the day after tomorrow you write the first application, which you send the next day.
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Today you will learn two jokes by heart, watch a funny movie, go out and make observations. Tomorrow you will tell the joke you learned, the next day you will reenact the best scene of the comedy and the next day your observations will be told to at least one person.
If you work on yourself just a little bit every day, the many tiny improvements become a smooth transition. It will be an ongoing process, that makes you feel proud of yourself each and every morning. Instead of a standstill you stay in motion (yes, like those pictures). Getting better every day means that you become more and more yourself every day.
And if you fail one time, don’t beat yourself up. Remember you’re still the main character in a movie, that’s no where near the end credits. You can do it, setbacks are a part of development, even Einstein has miscalculated sometimes. There will be a next chance to make a good decision.
You’re a good person, that is working to become great. The only thing that stands between the present you and the hero you want to be, is the work you have to put in. You have to make the right decisions. Question yourself every day, be honest with yourself.
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Are the decisions you make every day moving you forward, or are you treading water?
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Do you spend too much money or time on unnecessary trifles, even though you are dreaming big things?
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Do you treat yourself to the sugary-salty stuff every day, even though you want a toned body?
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Do you never clean your home, even though you long for a big visit?
- Are you wasting your time staring at a screen, but still have work to do?
What little thing can you change and improve on you today so that tomorrow you are closer to the superhero in the movie of your life? Becoming better really isn’t too hard, if you take baby steps. A few minutes every day, a couple of decisions is all it takes for a serious reinvention.
After some practice you will make the right decisions as if somebody pressed a button on a remote control. Once it’s a routine it’s an ongoing process. Small steps lead safely to the destination. You only have to work a little every day. Obviously we are not in a short film. Your current state is the result of all those answers over all those years. Tomorrow you will most likely not wake up as a entirely new person. But a reinvented one. Give yourself plenty of time, but right now is always the perfect time to take a first step from average guy to superhero.
So when you’re sitting at home beating yourself up about past mistakes. Shake your head and remember: As the director of this movie you can rewrite your destiny right now, all it takes is good will and patience.